coldmocha.com

Weird Internet man plans international Burn ‘The Prelude’ Day

(BP) – 6 hours ago

London — Internationally renowned webman/blogger/netpostingperson known as Coldmocha has controversially set about an initiative to burn his copy of Wordsworth’s ‘The Prelude’. His plans will come as a shock to his many readers from across the globe (currently numbering six, although two haven’t visited in about nine months). Mocha states his actions to be brought about by the fact that he was made to study “this faff” when attending college. He goes on to say “even though I read it like years ago, Bruv, the whole nature-loving thing and chasing clouds has left me scarred ever since. I remember sitting and looking at the sky one day and thinking what is this guy on about?”

It is expected that the two members of the Wordsworth Appreciation Society will protest vigorously at this defamation of the book. They insist that Mocha’s allegations that Wordsworth was “buzzing on opium” when he wrote the book are unfounded and that the affects of the opium were no more than the cigarettes you have today.

Critics and wisemen have decided to ignore Mocha’s ramblings and have simply dismissed him as “some obscure hick just looking to get some publicity by burning something that will get him his five minutes of fame in his otherwise pathetic and worthless life.” Mocha has reportedly delayed burning the book in a ploy to extend his time in the spotlight.

Author’s note: ‘The Prelude’ is a long poem written in free-verse that spans an entire book. Wordsworth had intended it to be a prelude to a three-part epic and philosophical poem. Judging by the length of ‘The Prelude’ itself, thank God he did not write the whole thing.

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