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Having grown bored of my current employment, I have decided to speculate about the types of careers I would like to go into. The usual stuff seems tedious and boring so I've decided to try and find something unique and interesting. So I drew up a letter in five minutes and just posted it. Let's hope I get a favourable reply.

And I think you will agree that I have found a gap in the market.

Customer Services Manager

Harrods Ltd

 87–135 Brompton Road
Knightsbridge
London, SW1X 7XL
United Kingdom

 10 October 2011

Dear Sir/Madam

I hope you are well.

I am writing to you with an unusual proposal but one that I think you will find both inspiring and revolutionary.

With the Christmas season fast approaching, I am sure that your luxurious and fine store is awash with preparations to lure in the crowds. I know for sure that supermarkets are well ahead of the game as I have seen mince pies on the shelves since September.

Christmas is, of course, a very competitive season and as the previous owner of your exquisite store always sought something to make Harrods stand out, I am sure the new owners intend to do the same. I am therefore offering my services to you as a Muslim Santa.

Now before you dismiss this idea, you should give consideration to the many nationalities that visit the store over the holiday period and what would be their inexpressible joy at seeing one of their own at the forefront of the store (Arab tourists to London are a great source of income). To further underline why I would be perfect for this role I can share with you that I actually have a full real beard measuring some six inches long, although it is black. I also have a growing stomach which would mean less padding required in my suit (may we also consider an alternative to red?). I also hold an excellent command of the English language and have been practising my ‘ho ho ho-ing’ in my poshest accent. A recording of this can be sent to you, should you desire.

Following the success of this season, you may then expand into doing the same for the Eid season, of which there is not one but two occasions a year. The opportunity for publicity and profitability it seems is manifold.

Please let me know your comments on my idea and when I can expect to visit you to officially sign my contract of employment.

I look forward to your positive response.

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